Archive for the ‘Motherhood’ Category
This. Is hilarious. I’m so referring to my van as “my ride” from now on. Word.
I am sitting in my bed, watching GMA and catching up on emails and some writing jobs. My daughter rushes into my bedroom, in full winter gear, giant pink LL Bean book bag strapped to her back. I hear the bus pulling up outside.
“Shayna, baby, the bus is here! What are you doing up here?”
“I need a tissue for Bethy [neighbor girl]! QUICK!”
I throw some Kleenex at her and she rushes (well, bounces) back out, shouting “LOVE YOU” as she flies down the stairs.
Then I hear her bouncing back UP the stairs.
Her little face, framed in her little pink hat covered by her little pink hood on her coat, pops around the frame of my bedroom door. She pursed her little pink lips and blew me a kiss.
“I didn’t wanna go without a kiss!” she breathed.
I blew her a kiss back and got the smile that lights up my world.
She turned, flew back down the stairs, gone.
In that moment I realized how freaking fast this is all going.
Sunday evening begins the Jewish holiday of Yom Kippur (“Day of Atonement”). It is the most serious and holy day of our year. It is a time of reflection and introspection, repentance and forgiveness, renewal and inspiration. We are currently in “the 10 days,” the period of time between our new year (Rosh Hashanah) and our day of atonement. It is the time we especially focus on our sins and mistakes, ask for and grant forgiveness from our friends and loved ones, and generally reflect on what we can do to improve ourselves in the coming year.
I completely own the fact that I am a snob in many areas. I’m not flaunting it; I simply acknowledge it. Most people are, whether they admit it or not. While I think everyone is entitled to their opinions, being ‘snobby’ about things does not make me a better parent or person than those who dissent. I know tons of families who have Cable, Wii, Barbies and processed food aplenty who are raising beautiful, healthy, kind, respectful, “good” kids. Ultimately, whatever my personal prejudices, living out one’s stellar values trumps pretty much everything else. So to those I may have offended or upset, I apologize.
I am working on being more open-minded in certain areas related to other people’s parenting styles, and it is going to be my major behavioral focus in the coming year. Let me be clear: I do NOT think it is my way or the highway. Plenty of ways to parent that are healthy and productive. But there are certain things that I believe are truly not effective or productive, and I’m working on being open to people who choose those methods and learning from the reasons they make their choices.
What are some things you feel you could be more open-minded about? How do you think you might be able to embrace the people behind the parenting?
I have a Barbie complex. I hate them. I didn’t play with them when I was little, and so of course my daughter loves them and is a real “girlie-girl.” I have embraced my inner princess when it comes to the girlie stuff (loads of nail polish, glitter, pink fluff, pink, and oh yes pink). But Barbie makes me gag. The ‘free-range‘ parent in me sits on one shoulder saying, “Get over yourself! It’s just a freaking doll with boobs!” And the grossed-out parent in me sits on the other shoulder saying, “It’s a freaking doll with boobs!”
I feel like we’re all assaulted with images of women that are gratuitous and unreal, why on earth would I give my daughter (or my sons, for that matter) a doll who looks like that to play with? I struggle, because Barbie and her friends are so much a part of the pretend play that little girls engage in at this age. I am aware that my adult eye see “hooker” and my daughter’s 5-year-old eyes see “doll with breasts like mommy.” She has no frame of reference to connect Barbie’s body with hers. Yet I just can’t get past this aversion. We’ve encouraged pretend play with baby dolls – trust me, my Shayna has plenty of dolls, doll accessories, doll everything. She loves it and she spends literally hours either by herself or with friends playing with these dolls. Yet every. single. time. we go to Target she asks for a Barbie. All her friends have them, and I know even at 5 this is an issue for her (a total girl thing. my boys were not aware of this kind of social stuff for years. and clearly, based on their lack of desire to shower, still aren’t).
*sigh* – any advice from veteran parents of girls out there?
Oh man is my oldest stressed out. The transition to middle school has not gone smoothly. He’ll be fine – so fine – but convincing him of this has been futile. He’s an emotional person to begin with, and has trouble not taking things personally. We’re working on that. I think I should have my own TV reality show: Dr. Mom: Non-Licensed Therepist Here’s to Hoping it All Turns Out Ok in the End.
The question that riles me the most as my youngest gets ready to begin kindergarten tomorrow is, “So what will you do with your time now?”
Oh, you know, mani-pedis, bon-bons, catch up on my soaps, lunch with the other Ladies of Leisure.
Are you freaking kidding me?
From April 15th, 2007 (my how time flies):
It was loud. It was flailing its limbs and shrieking in a hideous display of unmitigated anger. It threw itself towards me, face red with rage.
“I no want the red f**k! I no want the red f**k!!”
Ohhhhhh, you don’t want the red FORK. Which fork did you want?
“I no wanna f**k! I wanna use my hands!”
POSTED IN JANUARY 2007:
- If one leaves 3 wet bathingsuits wrapped up in 3 wet towels inside a bag inside the car for 4 days during well below 20-degree temperatures, it freezes into one big ball. This ball of frozen swim wear does, in fact, fit through the hole of a front-loading washer.
- Little People figures do not survive a “sauna” in the microwave.
- Toddlers do not like it when the microwave is moved out of their reach. This makes them mad, and causes them to exhibit loud and agitated-hyenea-like behavoirs.
- Little People figures also do not survive a “tanning session” in an Easy-Bake Oven belonging to older siblings.
- Older siblings, strangely, do not liked to be locked in their room until they are 60.
So funny, I literally fell off my chair.